Real change doesn’t begin with a new policy. It begins with one person asking, “Could there be a better way?”
If you’ve worked in human services for any length of time, you’ve probably heard this phrase before:
“We’ve always done it this way.”
Maybe you’ve even said it yourself.
Most of the time, it isn’t said because people don’t care. In fact, it’s often the opposite. It comes from experience. We’ve found routines that seem to work. We’ve developed habits that feel familiar, predictable, and safe.
But Person-Centered Thinking challenges us to ask a different question:
What if the way we’ve always done it isn’t the best way to support the person standing in front of us today?
That’s not an easy question to ask. It requires humility. It requires curiosity. Most importantly, it requires a willingness to change ourselves before asking others to change.
Everyone Wants Change… Until They’re the One Changing
I often share this cartoon during trainings.
A speaker stands in front of a room and asks,
“Who wants change?”
Every hand shoots into the air.
Then the speaker asks a second question.
“Who wants to change?”
Suddenly, the room goes quiet.
It’s funny because it’s true.
Most of us want things to improve. We want better communication, stronger teams, and better outcomes for the people we support. But when improvement requires changing our own habits, routines, or thinking, it suddenly becomes much harder.
Person-Centered Thinking isn’t simply about changing services.
It’s about changing the way we think.
Sometimes Frustration Is the Beginning
Thomas Edison once said,
“Discontent is the first necessity of progress.”
At first glance, that sounds strange. We usually think of frustration as something negative.
But think about your own life.
How many positive changes happened because you finally reached the point where you said,
“There has to be a better way.”
Maybe it was your health.
Your finances.
A relationship.
Or simply the way you approached your work.
Frustration isn’t always the enemy.
Sometimes it’s the first step toward growth.
The question is whether that frustration leads us toward hope—or away from it.
Two Very Different Mindsets
In Person-Centered Thinking, we often talk about two different kinds of discontent.
Cynical Discontent
Cynical discontent is frustration without hope.
It sounds like:
“We’ve tried that before.”
“Nothing ever changes.”
“Why bother?”
“This is just how things are.”
When this mindset takes over, people stop bringing ideas forward. They stop asking questions. Eventually, they stop believing improvement is possible.
Optimistic Discontent
Optimistic discontent begins with the same feeling.
Something isn’t working.
But instead of giving up, it asks,
“What if there’s a better way?”
That’s the mindset that drives innovation.
It’s what inspires someone to question an outdated routine, try a different approach, or rethink a long-standing practice.
Optimistic discontent doesn’t ignore problems.
It believes problems can be solved.
And that’s where meaningful change begins.
Where Does Change Begin?
When people think about creating change, they often picture new policies, new leadership, or large organizational initiatives.
But meaningful change usually starts much smaller.
Personal Change
Every person-centered organization is built one person at a time.
Personal change doesn’t require permission.
It might be choosing to call someone by their name instead of a label.
It might be asking, “What matters to you?” before offering a solution.
It might be giving someone a little more choice, listening a little longer, or questioning a routine you’ve followed for years.
These may seem like small changes.
But small changes have a way of changing relationships.
Organizational Change
When enough people begin thinking differently, organizations begin changing too.
Maybe the people receiving services help interview new staff.
Maybe planning meetings include the voices of the people they’re about instead of simply talking about them.
Maybe policies evolve because someone had the courage to ask,
“Could we do this differently?”
Organizational change rarely begins in a boardroom.
It usually begins with someone willing to challenge the status quo.
System Change
Some changes reach beyond a single organization.
The HCBS Final Rule is a great example.
It shifted expectations across the country by emphasizing dignity, choice, community inclusion, privacy, and self-direction.
System change doesn’t happen overnight.
It often takes years.
But every major movement began because individuals believed people deserved something better.
It Starts Smaller Than You Think
It’s easy to look at large changes like HCBS and think,
“That’s bigger than me.”
But every system-wide improvement started as someone’s small idea.
Someone questioned an old routine.
Someone challenged an assumption.
Someone believed there was a better way.
Meaningful change rarely begins with a new policy.
It usually begins with one person asking, “Could there be a better way?”
That’s how cultures change.
That’s how organizations change.
And eventually…
That’s how systems change.
A Final Thought
Person-Centered Thinking isn’t about changing everything overnight.
It’s about refusing to stop asking one simple question:
“Is there a better way to support this person?”
Sometimes the answer is a different word.
Sometimes it’s a different conversation.
Sometimes it’s a completely different way of thinking.
Those small moments may not seem significant at first.
But they have a way of spreading.
One conversation influences a coworker.
One coworker influences a team.
One team influences an organization.
One organization influences a community.
And sometimes…
One community changes an entire system.
Every meaningful change starts somewhere.
Why not let it start with us?
- Where have I caught myself thinking, “We’ve always done it this way?”
- When something isn’t working, do I respond with cynicism or curiosity?
- What’s one small change I can make this week that doesn’t require anyone else’s permission?
- How could one small change in my daily work create a better experience for someone I support?
Putting It Into Practice
This week, identify one routine you’ve stopped questioning simply because it’s familiar.
Ask yourself:
“Is this still the best way to support the person in front of me?”
If the answer is no, choose one small thing to do differently.
Real change doesn’t usually begin with sweeping reforms.
It begins with one person willing to take the first step.
Want to Learn More?
If you’d like to learn more about Person-Centered Thinking or join one of our upcoming in-person PCT trainings, I’d love to connect with you.
Kurtis Parker
HCBS Coordinator & Certified Person-Centered Thinking Trainer
kparker@autism-vac.org